June has been a soulful growth spurt in my domain. Rich in the beauty of Life and its inevitable polarities.
In the beginning of the month I had the honor of holding a name giving ceremony for my dear friends and their baby girl. Baptizing a child, holding space for the expansion of Love through spoken words, blessings, breathwork and meditations deepened me and my heart to a new extent. Only a few days after I attended a funeral of a close family member. The next day my partner slipped a disk, and ended up in excruciating pain, spending the whole night at the ER, unable to walk or stand. He’s been assigned to bedrest ever since.
They* (*I am they) say you grow through pressure and so it is; I get to live by my own words. There is something incredibly humbling when life throws you a curveball. It shakes you awake. What has been surprising here has been as the external pressure increased, it brought the internal pressure (stress, traumas, beliefs) to the surface simultaneously. It was as all this life (love and death included) created a newfound self-sufficiency in which I was able to sit with a new layer of an old narrative. Like had I just grown a few inches tallers, and a hella lot years wiser.
I’m Aquarius to the bone. I love when I expand beyond my perceived consciousness, creating more space to see and feel into what is true and certainly to see and feel into what is not true. In this new expanded landscape I was faced with a very old and a very subconscious story that went something like this: “You’re too sensitive to handle life. Look at you. So many years of nervous system deficiency. You can’t handle an excessive amount of external pressure because you can’t trust yourself to create a safe internal environment.” It’s been a loyal story that’s kept me avoidant and afraid of stepping into greater expansion, personally as professionally. More so it’s colored just about any pressure with the same traumatic colors: survival and unsafety. No matter how little or big the perceived stressor was in reality.
So with a beloved in pain, who needed help with just about anything, a puppy in his prime teens, work, life, householding duties and everything in between I was forced to not only create a new pathway, but also to walk myself down the aisle of that new pathway pretty immediately if everyones basic needs were to be met. When the going gets tough, the tough gets going. Present, open and tender meanwhile. For the first time I felt a sense of ultimate somatic relaxation even though I was juggling many external/internal things at the same time. When I tensed up, forgot to breathe and felt the old pattern creeping up on me, I coursecorrected back to the present moment, witnessing the story unravel.
I felt an organic pull to dedicate my time to some sweet physical/emotional/spiritual fitness to support me in this time. I’ve fallen back in love with my Kundalini Yoga and Medi practice, my subconscious reprogramming work, creative healing practices and some good ol’ gymtime with functional patterns (it really is all about the patterns, isn’t it?!)
Solstice brought about a whole new supersonic wave of energy that is taking me to new, untapped places internally. And I like it! That’s the thing with clearing space, healing, when we take the time to love on the parts of us that are tender, wounded or triggered, we actually heal. I also call it turning off a dripping faucet. And that precious water is no longer spilling all over, but flowing back into you as primal, creative lifeforce energy.
As we enter High Summer and vacation-mode What Moved Me: June edition is heavily influenced by some of my favorite tools and soothers for a more sufficient, simple and low-stress life, that I hope will serve you to lean back into the present moment, trusting the power You and Now and consciously create and enjoy a life that is True, Good and Beautiful, also when shit hits the fan (disclaimer: it just does)
When The Body Says No. Gabor Maté
I used to be incredibly stubborn when it came to trends. No matter how much I’d wanted to watch a certain movie, read a certain book or buy a piece of clothing, I couldn’t get myself to do it out of sheer aquarian-stubbornness with a splash of condescension. I know, I know. I missed out on so many good experiences because of this weird little perception of mine. Oh well, we live and we learn. And man do I learn! After watching “The Wisdom of Trauma” last year, the documentary about Dr. Gabor Maté, I of course had to get my hands on one of his books. Having gone through my own fair share of trauma therapy last year “When The Body Says No” was the place to start for me. Gabor Maté is a revolutionary empath in the world of healing. His simple, yet profound way of meeting human beings in their utmost humanity reflects back a universal mirroring for the reader. He truly is a pioneer in the field of trauma healing, which is the pivotal point for collective healing as well.
I love nothing more than sitting in an intimate setting with a loved one, having a heart to heart conversations on all the waves and stages of life. I did exactly that a few weeks ago with my dear friend Lisa O’Connor, who is also the woman behind A RADIANT LIFE podcast. Stay tuned for her next couple of days as our episode drops right here
My boyfriend and I had a rare full-day in bed (due to his slipped disk) and we both felt like watching something soothing and inspiring for the soul. Buddhist Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh was not only the mind and heart behind what intial became the mindful movement, he was also a rebel and a peaceful warrior. He was amongst some of the first monks to learn English as he saw the need for transmitting this sacred teaching to a part of the world that needed it so badly: The West. It’s a moving and beautiful documentary about life, joy, suffering, love and the medicine of laughter. It’s a reminder that changemakers and rebels come in all expressions of life. And we all have the change to impact the world a little (or a lot more) lovingly, when we turn inwards and answer according to our hearts.
Last month I went on about my new night routine. All these years I’ve been about my morning routine: my morning coffee, my morning practice, my morning pages. I found myself a little restless at night, and felt a need to do something ritualistic to close off the day in a calm manner. Also, I’m really all about making life a little more #spa. Nurtue Vitaviva sent me their trifecta of supplements that are created to soothe stress and overall health in the body/mind. I’ve instantly added all their supplements to my routine, but found myself especially excited about their Be sleepful supplements with all natural ingredients and herbs including hops and valerina, these cuties won’t knock you out but gently help your body chill and adapt before entering dreamland.
As I mentioned I’m back in love with my daily practice. It’s been a little quiet over at The Practice. This Spring was a deep integration of all the work, internally and externally, I’ve done the past year. I needed to let everything land in its own time/space and not force anything for the sake of “to-do’s” To me that’s always the most magnetic way of working because each creation has a life and a will of its own, and when we give it time, it’ll communicate with us; clearly. And so did The Practice. A few days ago we released a new practice: INTERSTELLAR VISION AND WISDOM and it has quickly turned into one of my favorites practices ever. It’s soothing, it’s energizing, it’s mystical, it’s inspiring. I’m so excited to hear what interstellar insights, visions and wisdoms you receive through this practice.